Anger is a natural emotion which is always followed by a feeling of emptiness. This is so because when you are angry, you lose out on your mind and so you are left vacuous.
“Anybody can become angry – that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way – that is not within everybody”s power and is not easy.” – Aristotle
Communication skills are the most important assets to have goodwill in the society and anger is something that prevents us from doing so. Anger is an obstacle in our personality development and deteriorates our personality. An angry person tends to lose his peace of mind and thus people want to avoid the person because of his uncomfortable presence. Anger is accompanied by many psychological changes as well. It leads to increased heart beat, rise in blood pressure which harms the body and thus personality development hampers.
Anger arises when you think that something is going off track, something is not in right place, something is not happening as per your wishes.
Anger is not the basic problem, but managing anger is the main issue we people face. Most of us do not know what steps should be taken while you are angry. If the problem of poor anger management perceives for a long time it may lead to domestic abuse, workplace violence, addiction to smoking, drugs etc. It may also lead to physical problems in the long run. An angry man also has a poor memory. Your anger lets you lose your mental balance.
To combat anger it is very important to understand the reason behind it. Then only you would be able to treat it in the right direction. We generally try to look out for things that give us pleasure and we get obsessive to grab it. We want to possess something we desire and this desire to possess is the root of anger (in most cases). Till the desire is fulfilled, anger supports our struggle. Anger may also arise on a small situation like hitting your foot against bed. At this point, you think why did I get that, where was I wrong, do I actually deserve being hurt? All the questions may start troubling your mind with a small thing of being hurt by the bed. In such situation, when you have the feeling of anger within you, you would either express it or suppress it.
Suppressing anger can surely help to a certain extent but when to try doing it again and again, whatever the situation may be, you may find yourself in a state of depression or you may have constant headache and other mental problems. By suppressing your anger you may think that your anger is under control but one day you would find that you would just burst in anger because you have been suppressing your anger for so long.
Anger must be expressed but it should be done in such a way that it gives a healthy result and resolves the problem.
TIPS FOR ANGER MANAGEMENT
1. Before reacting to any situation in anger, take a few deep breaths and count backwards from 100 to 1. This would make you feel relieved of anger. You will feel relaxed mentally and physically. Also, you will get time to analyze the problem and find a solution to it.
2. Shouting at family or friends, slamming the door would only ignite the anger even more. Move away from people or place that made you angry. Buy a punching bag, a stress bursting ball and make the best out of them.
3. Avoid speaking with anyone when you are angry. Once you have calmed down, you can now express your feelings and concerns in an assertive way. At this point of time, you will not be hurting anyone. It’s better to remain quite in some situations and in others you must think before speaking. Involve yourself in the situation, collect your thoughts you want to express and say it in the right way so that you do not have to regret in future.
4. Involve yourself in some physical activity. Go for a brisk walk, run or do some sport. Your energy would be utilized in this way and you would end up feeling happier and relaxed.
5. Anger management is not a child’s play so do not hesitate to seek help from others on this matter. Look out for anger management classes, counselling, and workshops by professionals. It is better to ask for help from others rather than hurting people around you.
Anger adversely affects your public speaking skills, communication skills, presentation skills, personality development and not to forget, your health. Consequently, you must follow the above tips to manage your anger with affecting your public speaking, communication skills and personality development.
In the public speaking and personality development course offered by Anurag Aggarwal Institute of Public Speaking, you also get assistance on anger management. For course details, visit www.anuragaggarwal.com